Dear Gail,
On the dating site I use, it asks people to say whether they are slim, fit, or about average. The majority of women I’ve met have put down average and when they showed up they were overweight at best. According to the most recent studies, 66 percent of Americans are overweight or obese. The average for American women is 170 lbs, but according to ideal weight charts, if you weigh 170 you should be 5’ 11”.
Average is heavy and I prefer slim women. Am I being unrealistic to expect women to be honest about their weight?
Doubting Don
Dear Doubting Don:
In a word “yes.” Everybody lies. We each pick our spot: height, weight, age or decades old pictures - the truth is fluid baby. Apparently you aren’t meeting enough women who are 5’11”. I personally do not know one woman who isn’t on a diet, obsessing about the five pounds she gained over night, or desperately seeking an Ozempic prescription. I’ve been dieting since birth.
The scale is public enemy #1. Never own one if you seek any sort of personal happiness. The last time I stepped on a scale I sought counseling. I now determine my weight according to how my jeans fit. Truthfully since COVID I’ve been afraid to put on a pair. Vuori, is the promised land!
Conversely, I have never heard a man complain he looks fat. Seriously, middle age men must be swallowing beach balls for the stomachs that protrude and hang over their waist. Ironically, they’re happy and think they’re still hot. Hey Mr.XXL you’re delusional not delectable.
How tall must the average male be in order to be in sync with their weight? Able to dunk over LeBron. I have been on dates with men who put “average” as their body size and kissed that weight behind senior year in college.
Doubting Don, the only way to avoid further disappointment is to leave cyber space and go outside to look for women in the three dimensional world.
I lie about my age.
When will dating sites start asking how weightest men are, on a scale from "moderately fat-phobic" to "incredibly bigoted?"
I attended a girls boarding school in the 1960s where there were dances with nearby boys' boarding school. To sign up you had to put down your height - but not weight. All my classmates added a couple of inches to their height. You didn't want to be paired up with a shrimp! We also brought a deck of cards with us in case our arranged date dumped us before the bus home.